When COVID-19 had finally hit Europe and more specifically Austria, life changed rapidly. Set to move to Australia with a box of my belongings already waiting for me in Queanbeyan, there I was: stuck in my apartment without a rental agreement, a job that was about to end a few weeks later and a plane ticket that was suddenly worthless. How had I gone from the best timing to move away to the worst timing possible? I was angry, frustrated, and sad. Our borders were technically closed, something I – a true believer in the European project – have never experienced in my 28 years of existence. But what if in the end, we all ended up exactly where we were supposed to? What if the universe wasn’t really trying to punish me – as I had told myself many many times – by making it impossible for me to move to Australia in April? What if it turned out to be a blessing, despite all the tears I have shed?
A dear friend of mine (half Austrian-half Australian, obviously we’re destined to be friends) has accompanied me virtually in those – at least for me – difficult times. He has managed to put a smile on my face and drag me out of my days of self-compassion when I needed it most by reminding me to work with what I have and to take it day by day. Now, patience does not run in my blood naturally and as much as I love the fact that I can be very determined (mum calls me stubborn, but I like a more positive attitude), I keep stinging myself in the back like Scorpios stereotypically do. Seriously, why are we always so hard on ourselves? The other day, my friend – let’s call him A – shared a post on LinkedIn with a quote by Alexander Graham Bell and it triggered something in me:
‘When one door closes another door opens (well that’s not new, but it’s the second part that struck me!), but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us. ‘
The past few weeks and months have been characterised by many ‘don’ts’ and ‘can’ts’, they are called restrictions for a reason after all! All of a sudden, our focus shifted to the things we couldn’t do, instead of seeing what there is we CAN do. Perhaps, some of you – like myself – adopted a negative mindset and gave the downwards spiral a free ride, as we’d say in German. But sometimes, we just need to accept things as they are and put them in a different perspective in order to shed light on those doors that have opened for us. This isn’t always easy, but I’d like to give it a try.
A few weeks ago, I moved back to the countryside to stay with my family for a while, at least for as long as I have figured out where I’m going and what I’m going to do. Experts say young people are affected most by the recession, so I hope they are not fed up with me just yet. I am the fittest I have ever been (and I haven’t even set a foot to the gym!), I have had the best sleep in years, I have reconnected with my pal nature as I go for long walks, hikes or runs, I have picked the most beautiful wild flowers, I got to spend more time with my family, particularly with my brother whom I had neglected for a very long time, I have practiced yoga and meditation, which has given me strength and has helped me revive my positive attitude, I have cooked healthy meals, baked delicious cakes and bread, and I have finally worked out what sector I want to work in. Now I know those are not literally doors, but to me, all of the above surely do feel like one hell big of a door.
Obviously, I don’t know what would have happened, if things had worked out let’s say ‘according to plan’, but if I had got on that plane one month earlier as anticipated, I probably would have been on that rescue plane a month later anyways heading back to Austria and I can only imagine how devastated I would have been, if that had been the case. Unemployment has risen significantly in every country, rules for migration are becoming even more difficult and hope for change for the better is high. I’m not saying I’m giving up on Australia just yet, I’m determined, remember? 😉 But I am saying that perhaps it’s not the right time for me to do it just yet and maybe I’m exactly where I should be: back home with my family, surrounded by nature and many possibilities to learn new and old things helping me change my direction, professionally and personally. What about you? Do you think you are right where you should be? Or are you still looking regretfully upon that door that so happens to be closed right now?